TOM BALL, Senior Editor (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Globetrotting Tom Ball has been chased out of more countries than he can remember visiting. A fugitive on the lam with an archaeology degree, he spends his days hiding under rocks writing fiction and other junk for his devoted readers here on Earth and also Mars. His real name is Tom Ball. He stills resides in the body he was born in. Tom has the final say on who gets published so you know what name to give the hit man if you don’t.
CHARLES PINCH, Senior Editor (email@example.com)
You just know any dude whose name is a noun and a verb will end up being an editor at some literary hell hole. Writing before he was walking, editing before he was talking, Charles sees himself as an infant prodigy. Other people just see him as an infant. He holds in one of his three hands a double major in fine arts and philosophy and has published all kinds of fiction and other crap you better f***ing read if you want to get published here.
RICHARD WANG, Junior Editor (firstname.lastname@example.org
Richard is a polymath who makes the rest of us feel inferior which explains why we're all in therapy. He has authored graphic novels, directs films (his own and others) while trying to remember he's also an engineer and speaks a couple languages none of us understand. At this moment he's drafting his Nobel Prize acceptance speech on a napkin. Oh yeah, he's also a napkin designer.
ROBERT QUEHL, Junior Editor (email@example.com)
Rob is the voice of sanity which is why the rest of us have trouble comprehending him. Rob is the rock on the shore who steadfastly watches us drown after warning us we can’t swim. (Hey Rob! Help!) Rob is the light in the room after the bulb kicks out. Rob is the author of a couple of books and has a perverse love for working full time as an editor.
STEVE HANDS, Junior Editor (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Hands down, Steve is the most cosmopolitan of our dude-sextet. He has travelled extensively while avoiding the law and is the former publisher of Lizard magazine (Thailand). As you can see, Steve’s love of reptiles has strongly influenced his writing. He does most of his composing in a well-stocked terrarium, cavorting with the other cold-bloods. He currently lives in Britain which is why it’s Great!
HEZEKIAH SCRETCH, Poetry Editor (email@example.com)
Poetry editor Hezekiah comes with a wealth of experience gained from panhandling. When he isn’t hexing ammeters, he’s writing blank verse, which, despite his efforts turns out to be pretty much blank. A devout misogynist who failed spectacularly at charm school, he despises formal education, the likes of which granted him a PhD in comparative lit. Is he Man or Myth? Mandrake or Mephistophles?
ISSUE 4 OCTOBER 1, 2019
Welcome to Fleas on the Dog! We’re a no frills brown bag BYOW(eed) online lit rag. (We like to think we’re underground with our heads sticking out.) We don’t care about pretty pictures or fancy layouts. We’re interested in one thing and one thing only: GOOD WRITING. Our sole mandate is quality which means if your mother likes your writing we probably won’t.
With this issue we are introducing 2 new categories. The first is Poetry. We were deluged with it even though we only called for short fiction and nonfiction. Apart from the obscene sonnets we carved into washroom walls, we don’t know a heck of a lot about it. (The Wasteland is an album by U2, right?) So we coerced, no, invited, bardo-bard Hezekiah Scretch to abase himself as our Poetry Editor. The fact that he despises verse of any kind is only important if you’re a nitpicker. And so the dude quintet has become the dude sextet.
The other new category is Plays (Drama). Since all six of us agreed that Shakespeare’s Death of a Salesman is our all-time favourite comedy, we knew we were on the right track. Besides, what Streetcar wouldn’t Desire such a category? So if your name’s Sam Shepard or David Mamet (and even if it isn’t) you’re welcome to submit your play, previously performed or perennially rejected.
We’re proud to announce two writers are making their publishing debut in Issue 4. Congratulations to J(J-priryodhi) and Michael Lange! You’ll find both of them under ‘Fiction’.
And among our veteran writers we are honoured to feature Ted Hughes Award 2019 nominee Maria Straw-Cinar (poetry). 2017 Booranga Center (Australia) Fiction Prize winner Mitchell Grabois (poetry); the San Francisco James D. Phelan Award winner and 4 times Pushcart nominee Nels Hanson (fiction). West Texas Literary Review fiction editor Joel Page (fiction). Poetry Pacific editor and 10 times Pushcart nominee Yuan Changming (poetry), Director of the Gallo Tricolor Review and Robespierre Review Daniel de Culla (fiction), Andrew Steketee, first place winner of the MIP Book Awards: Art/Photo 2002 (fiction) and John Conway winner of the John Curtis Award for Lifelong Learning (plays).
It’s a fulsome issue, frank and feisty, with lights and darks from talent that rocks. We hope you enjoy it. And until we meet again in Issue 5 always spread the love and remember READ is the best 4 letter word in the world. Tom, Charles, Richard, Robert, Steve and Hezekiah
We are a collective of writers/editors who publish a non profit online magazine for those who are on the avant garde and outside the box.
WHAT WE LIKE
Fiction: We take pretty much everything. Mainstream, traditional, literary, barbaric yawps, flash, metafiction, experimental, sci/fi, speculative, fantasy, mystery, micro, nano, grunge, bad (but it better be good!), modernist, post-modernist, spamlit, kitschlit, retro, metro, outsider, novel excerpts, graphic stories, even comics. Our only criterion is quality.
Poetry: Up to ten poems any style.
Plays: Any style up to five acts.
Nonfiction: Kick ass op-eds, essays and articles on topical topics that are sure to p*** somebody off, memoirs, manifestos, reviews, games, nonsense and other cogent junk. Politically incorrect is welcome as long as it doesn’t devolve into invective.
WHO YOU ARE
Anybody whose engines burn when they write. You can have won literary awards or never published at all. Degrees don’t impress us—it’s your work that matters.
ONLINE PUBLISHING GUIDELINES
There is no submission fee. There is no remuneration for work we publish, either, but what the heck, you're going to be famous! We'll get back to you in about 10 days, hopefully sooner. (Why should it take weeks?)
Fiction/Nonfiction: Up to 5000 words. Length is less important than quality. For works longer than 5000 words query the editors about possible serialization.
Submissions should be on a Microsoft Word doc or docx file. Use a sensible font. Double space format. Stuff like grammar and sentence structure is important unless your work deliberately exploits bad grammar and lack of structure. (We can tell the difference.) Include a brief bio with your submission and publishing credits, if any. Send your submission as an e-mail attachment to firstname.lastname@example.org (or type in the link in the email address).
Include the genre (fiction, nonfiction, poetry, or play) and title of your work in the subject bar. Simultaneous submissions are okay, just let us know when your work is accepted elsewhere. Multiple submissions are not okay unless solicited. Submit to only one category per issue. If you have been published by us please do not resubmit for six months unless solicited. We retain the first rights of your work for a period of three months. After this time rights revert back to the author. If you should republish the story/article please acknowledge that it was first published by www.fleasonthedog.com
TO BE ANNOUNCED
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